I wanted to be Nicole Thompson. I envied her long blonde locks, and the perfection that was her handwriting. I can still remember how she munched awkwardly on her apple at snack time; avoiding getting pieces of fruit lodged in her braces. I pleaded with my mom to pack me an apple for snack time too, and every day, attempted to eat mine in the same fashion.
I was her best friend.
The only problem was, so was Emily!
Nicole often enjoyed pitting me and Emily against each other; taunting us with the most miniscule reasons why she was going to play with one of us, and not the other…
“I like Emily’s shoes, so today I’m going to play with her on the monkey bars instead of you!” she would say, leaving me alone to drag my feet in the bark, and contemplate what was so wrong with my shoes.
Hater.
Many years later, and after I had just recently gotten married, the first couple I – so nervously – invited over for dinner, spent the first few bites of the meal I had made , bickering back and forth about whether the pasta she makes was better than the one I had made!
She savored another bite, and then looked to her husband. Both of them nodded in agreement. Her’s was most definitely better, it seemed.
Mine was ‘missing a little something’ she would go on to say, resting her fork on her plate and graciously asking my husband to pass the bread.
cough* Hater.
Around this very time last year I posted a request for prayer on Facebook; specifically for me and my extended family in a time of great need.
I had someone contact me privately and tell me how inappropriate it was for a Pastor’s family to reach out for prayer like that.
hmmm….
Hater.
Whispers then began to circulate; speculation spread about why I had asked for prayer in the first place, and our moment of desperation as a family was met with a wealth of malicious rumors and lies!
Months later and completely unrelated to my plea for prayer, my husband got a job in New York, and we were surprised to find that our decision to be obedient and follow God where He had called us, was met with unwelcome opinions openly declaring that we were making a huge mistake!
Some even laughed, as if to say God wanting us in Manhattan was a joke…
Many others, wouldn’t even say goodbye.
Haters. Haters. Haters.
Now I know from the title of this post, it would be easy to assume that I will be addressing those haters, and no doubt use verses like “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths”, or how “a dishonest man spreads strife” in an attempt to put those haters in their place…
but that’s for another time!
It’s much more valuable instead, to address the nature of the Lord in situations like these.
Because around that time last year, when I found myself overwhelmed with grief and betrayal, I also found myself captivated by a verse; a verse that as a lifelong Pastor’s kid, I had never heard before.
And I will restore to you, the years the locusts have eaten…
Joel 2:25
This verse spoke straight into my current heartache, and every hurt proceeding it.
Because not only was God accepting the fact that there will be times in life where swarms of locusts will come – devastating our crops and stripping them of all life! He promises even then, to restore them!
He promises to restore us!
How long have ‘haters’ (aka locusts) been cutting down everything you have worked so hard for? Eating their fill of everything you have labored endlessly to protect, the very crops that we have spent our entire lives tending to -the very person we have worked so hard to become!
Locusts, leave us feeling defeated, and lifeless; laughing in our face, and spreading cold hearted lies, until they move on to the next crop that they want to destroy.
Just last week I traveled back home, and met these feelings head-on when past hurts and betrayals all came flooding back!
Especially when upon returning, I noticed a few people still shuffling awkwardly to avoid me in the church lobby and struggling to maintain eye contact through half-hearted inquisitions of how my husband and I were adjusting to our new life in the city.
Locusts…
I was discouraged – but only for a quarter of a moment! Because just as quickly as the pain of rejection was felt, I could hear the Lord’s still strong voice reminding me, that even without the ‘blessing’ of others, that I am indeed still a blessed person in spite of it!
How thankful I am that the Lord doesn’t rely on majority rule to determine the level of blessing He will put on my life! That He wont withhold His blessing just because others have!
He is bigger than the people bringing you down!
And He will see us through our hurts, and bring us back to a place of immeasurable blessing!
Just as Jesus who was beaten beyond recognition and who looked to be defeated on the cross, had come to life again just 3 days later – so can we rest in the fact, that the same power that brought His spirit back to life, is at work to do the same on our behalf!
During my trip back home – just as my past heartache came back – so also did my eyes open to the Lord’s amazing power of restoration in my life!
The flood of people who have seemed to leave my father’s church in a frenzy, have now given way to a crowd of others who have found their place amongst the same seats; finding Christ come alive, awakening their souls and calling them to life change, just like the previous people had!
The same friends who walked with me through the darkest of days last year; meeting me for coffee at random hours of the night and holding me as I cried, can now chat about more light hearted topics, such as mice eating brownies off my counter and Tom Selleck sightings!
And in just a year, the family that I requested be lifted up in prayer, has now taken giant strides – with or without the prayers of others – thanks to the Lord’s unfailing love and restoring power!
No more hiding behind fake smiles, of past hurts. No more shielding ourselves from the extreme ill will of others. Instead, we laughed over banana waffles, and participated in group hugs until everyone screamed out in frustration. I went on a lunch date with my dad and went shopping with my mom, and made nearly every effort I could to embarrass my little brothers.
Sweet restoration!
And Just like the emerging blossoms from a tree after a barren and bitterly cold winter,
Or a loved ones embrace after too many months and miles have seperated you.
Like a heartfelt apology that mends the deepest wounds,
And the first laugh after a season of sorrow,
So is the restoring power of Christ
Available to each of us!
And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace… will Himself, restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.
1 Peter 5:10
*** And to all the Haters: Quit being a locust. It’s not a flattering look on you!
Love it, Krista! You are an excellent writer and these words clearly came straight from your heart! Sorry I missed seeing you when you were here! Keep writing! You have a gift!
Blessings,
Amanda
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Thank you Amanda! You are so kind! Thanks for letting me know what you think. Wish I could have seen you also, but not to worry I will be back again… and again… and again. You guys can’t get rid of me that easy! 😉 Thanks for reading! I hope you and your lovely family are doing well!
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Hi Krista! I’m a old friend of Rachel’s…I love reading your guys’ blog posts. They are always such an encouragement and a blessing to me! I must admit, reading about how people treated you made me sad. I can’t understand why some people feel that they must tear others down. I always think that those people must be very insecure and miserable..but I guess knowing that doesn’t necessarily make their betrayal any easier to deal with. I loved your insight, what a beautiful reminder! God is a restorer, he brings beauty out of ashes and good out of difficult circumstances. When I feel I am being mistreated, I think of Hagar and how she calls God El Roi, the God who sees…He sees the struggles of His children, He sees the hurt caused by others and He cares deeply. So thankful that we can always count on him to be faithful and that His love is deeper than our deepest hurts. Thank you for sharing your heart and being transparent!
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Thank you soooo much Sara! Your insight really spoke to me as well! How comforting it is to know that the Lord sees our pain right? That he hurts with us, and that no matter how deep the hurts, that He can restore us! Thank you for sharing your thoughts, I was really blessed by them! And thank you for reading! I know I speak for both me and Rachel, when I say the fact that anybody ever gets anything out of our silly words on this blog is truly a God thing! 🙂 We are just living life like everyone else; gritting our teeth through the tough times, and searching for the true joy that only the Lord can offer! Thanks for reaching out Sara!
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I am Shirley (Trenton Hanson’s mom). What a pleasure it was to see you and Gia again at River Rock”s new location. I understand what you are saying as my late husband was a PK as well. It’s so weird that the preacher’s kids are held to much higher standards just because of their title. I love the way you carry yourself with such grace. You are a beautiful mother and wife and don’t let the nay Sayers make you feel anything other than what has made you to be. I am praying for your family and all your new experiences as I enjoy your blog.
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You are so sweet Shirley! Thank you for that encouragement, and thank you for reading! It was nice to be home and visit with you all… now back to crazy town! haha! Thanks for be willing to share your thoughts with me! I really appreciate it! Give River Rock my love! 🙂
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I just found your blog tonight. I’m originally from Portland, Oregon. I’m now living in SLC, UT the last 17 years. Your words brought healing to my soul. There has been a lot of locusts in my life the past 5 years. I’ve been beaten down by many haters. I’ve so struggled with God and what he was doing. I realize he can restore me and love me through the haters in my life. Thank you. God knew I needed this.
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thanks for reaching out Debbie! Glad i am not the only one who has experienced locusts and the damage they so often do! Glad God could use my hurts and search for restoration, to help begin the restoration process in you! Blessings to you!
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Krista,
I love coming to your blog. I love your honesty and your style and most of all, how real you are.
I’ve had those haters in my life – and all at church. From my experience, they speak from a place of jealousy and the realization that they have no ambition, so to them, your ambition and risk taking is condemning them to the mediocre life they’ve allowed themselves to live. Sadly, you can’t help them. God has all these blessings for them, but they are content to live like paupers instead.
You have come out way ahead 🙂
Blessings,
Debbie
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Thank you Krista! Your posts always encourage me and remind me of the strength and power of our God. Have had many locusts lately and been trying to figure out what it is I’m supposed to be learning from it all… Thank you for always keeping it real!!
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