So we blew up the blogosphere this last week…
Like for real, and entirely on accident!
And as Rachel and I watched the number of daily visitors grow on our blog – doubling, tripling, and so on… and so on – I realized something new about myself…
Success isn’t my scene.
While it makes me momentarily want to dance on the table in excitement, just as quickly, it had me rocking back and forth in fetal position, scratching my eyelids, and taking an oath that I would never write again.
Throughout the week, it’s entirely possible that I made a few frantic phone calls to Rachel, where we weighed our options, and questioned whether it would be best to just shut down the blog completely (no really… we were THAT freaked out!)
And yet, interestingly enough, here I am once again.
Only took 500 gallons of chamomile tea to calm my escalating heart rate, and another trillion prayers to the Lord Almighty, but I am here!
But due to the attention we got this last week, and taking into consideration the many feathers I ruffled ( because apparently people don’t understand the disclaimer: “I know this post will offend people… and for the record I am not sorry!”) I thought it might be fitting to clarify a few things:
Yes, I am a pastor’s wife. And no, that’s not a title I can live up to! Being a ‘Pastors wife’ is in no way my identity (you won’t here me ‘name dropping’ that in posts to come…) And whether you choose to believe it or not, I am a human being just. like. you!
I am not über spiritual- In fact the Real Housewives of New Jersey and I have an ongoing date on my couch every week (and if there are wheat thins and chocolate covered acai berries involved, then all the better!) Admittedly, I curse on occasion for emphasis, and I make a MEAN margarita!
That being said, while it’s entirely your choice whether or not you hold me to the unrealistic standard of what you believe that a Pastor’s wife should be, if you choose to do so, I can say with 100% certainty that I will fail. Miserably.
And when I do, it’ll be your fault for putting me on that pedestal -not mine!
And if you don’t like that, then this blog is not for you.
I also am by no means the picture of a perfect parent. I secretly despise the playground, too often turn to the plethora of take-out menus for dinner at night, and it’s entirely possible that the first music my daughter ever heard in the womb was a Black Eyed Pea’s song, that my husband and I had methodically picked out!
And if you don’t like that, then…
well, you get where I am going with this!
I love the Lord deeply with all that I am. And whether or not a relationship with Him is what you desire, you hang with me long enough and it’s likely my faith will be contagious.
So a word of caution: If that is something you are extremely opposed to, then this blog might not be for you. (Although, I secretly hope you will stick around anyway!:)
If my grammatical errors anger you to the point where you feel the need to comment about them, then I am sorry, but it seems you have confused me with a real writer!
Simply put, I am a stay at home mom, who – what I lack in hobbies, is made up for with dishes in the sink! I struggle daily to get out of my pajamas, and am always scrambling to get my weekly blog post done in time while my two year old crawls all over my limbs, feeding me fistfuls of goldfish crackers in an attempt to get me to impersonate the cookie monster (which for the record, I have no shame in doing!)
All that to say, if you are looking for an eloquent speaker or errorless presentation, then this will never be the blog for you!
As for me, I will cling to the hope that if God can use simple farmers, despised tax collectors, and even sons of prostitutes to bring Him glory, then surely the Lord in all of His greatness, won’t even bat an eye at the mish-mash that can be my english!
And given the chance that I get a negative comment – or give or take a few HUNDRED like last week! 😉
I will not respond. Ever!
I know, I know… you are “being pressed by the Holy spirit” to tell me how wrong I am and what not, but regardless, that’s just not me. It’s not that I don’t respect your opinion, it’s that I don’t write to please you – or anyone else for that matter!
I write because God has laid it on my heart to be unapologetically honest and courageously me! To be vulnerable enough to share my weakest, and rawest thoughts so that He can meet me there and transform my heart to be more like His. NOT to merely write for His people; their praise, their public acclaim, or to address their criticism!
So if you are looking to debate with someone or are itching for a feud,
This
Blog
Is
Not
For
You.
Phew! Now that we got that out of the way – and since we have weeded off all the haters by now – may those of you who are still with us, continue on this journey of true authenticity. The kind where we aren’t afraid to publicly declare that our kids are making us cray cray, that our spouse is one- dirty- q tip – left – on – the – counter away from sleeping on the fire escape (like, indefinitely!) and to address that more often then not, we struggle with feelings of being not enough; enough of a provider, enough as a spouse, enough as a parent, and at times, even enough as a CHRISTIAN! Gasp! I know, its scandalous I tell you!
Together, I hope we can learn to lean into Christ for all that we need, learning to love Him and trust Him more, so that with His strength we can embrace the (at times craaaaazy) life he has laid out for us!
We will be your guides, and although we can’t promise perfection, an agreeable nature (or in my case, savory language 100% of the time) you do have our word that we will be honest and raw to the core, in hopes that one day you too will be able to do the same!
And if THAT is what your soul has been so desperately longing for, then I am so happy to announce that this IS the blog for you! And we couldn’t be happier to have you on board!
But before I go I must publicly declare…
that I, Krista,
do solemnly swear,
to never curse a crockpot ever again! 😉
There. I said it. Now can we all just get along?
Krista Ortiz 
I wanted to take this opportunity to share with everyone a wonderful study on biblical womanhood co-authored by Nancy Leigh DeMoss and Mary Kassian. The study is called “True Woman 101-Divine Design.” It’s an eight-week study on key fundamentals of what biblical womanhood looks like. (I posted a link below). I personally have been very blessed by the teaching of Nancy Leigh DeMoss, who is the host of Revive our Hearts. She is also the author of many books, including the bestseller, “Lies Women Believe and The Truth that Sets Them Free.” The Revive our Hearts website http://www.reviveourhearts.com as well as the True Woman website, (affiliated with Revive our Hearts) http://www.truewoman.com are wonderful websites that can minister to any woman in any season of life.
You will find solid biblical teaching and great resources to help us be the women, wives, and moms God has called to be. I hope these sites will bless you as much as they have blessed me.
In Him,
Arlene
https://www.reviveourhearts.com/store/product-group/true-woman-101/
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Yay! You know what? I’ve been eyeing a crock-pot in the Black Friday circular for a week now. I can’t wait. Yay for the crock-pot! Will you come cook in my crock-pot, clean my house, entertain my kid, and whatever else I’m supposed to be doing too? And while you’re at it, I could totally use a margarita.
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Just three words, Krista, I love you! Being that I am of the “Thelma and Louise” variety of Jesus girls, I tend to lean toward the honesty side, and often take my prophetic spiritual gift to places it probably should not go, but if we do not share our hearts, how will we survive? Light and truth are absolute, period. Regardless of what others have posted to you. It is your truth and your light to share. Thank you for being the bearer of the light and truth. Some folks just need sunglasses, while others like you and me can take the light full on… Keep going, dear woman, keep going…..
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Love, love, love your blog and yours is the first blog I’ve ever followed. God is teaching me that he created to me to be just like I am and your words are affirming…I love God’s timing. Thank you for being true to you and true to God. God bless you!!!!
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A friend shared your post last week on Facebook! I absolutely loved it, and I found it extremely refreshing. I think because of social media we live in a world of facades, and I always feel like I am not up to par. I loved how real you are, and the advice you gave. God is doing great things through you! Keep it up!
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Awesome stuff! Going through a few things at the moment and it was great to see I’m not the only one that struggles!! Loving your blogs!
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I think it is fantastic that you are REAL! So many Christians try so hard to look good they make the rest of us feel badly! Thanks for sharing yourself through this blog! Keep writing! 🙂
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Your blog IS FOR ME! LOVE IT! And will continue reading. Although I do love me crock pot and thank God for the person who invented it 🙂
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Just found your blog through a Facebook share. Love it so far, and can’t wait to read what else God does in your life and with this blog!
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I just thought this song suited today’s discussion. It’s “I Believe” by JJ Heller
(Verse)
There are so many things about You I don’t understand
But I believe
I keep moving forward when I’m holding Your hand
I believe
(Chorus)
The truest things I know
Are those I cannot see
From my birth to my dying day
I believe
(Verse)
When I’m old I’ll talk about the things that You have done
I believe
Brokenness made beautiful
The wars that You have won
And the storms You calmed in me
(Chorus)
The truest things I know
Are those I cannot see
From my birth to my dying day
I believe
I’d rather have Jesus than houses or lands
I’d rather be led by his nail pierced hands
I’d rather have Jesus than anything…
(Chorus)
The truest things I know
Are those I cannot see
From my birth to my dying day
I believe
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Thank you for your honesty! You are an inspiration!
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Love your blog! I’m staying! xo
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I found your blog from your controversial post that someone posted on facebook. After reading some of the comments about you swearing, I had to scour the whole post to see what they were talking about. ha ha. I like how real you are and how you handled the negative feedback in this new post.
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I know better than to read comments but I let myself get sucked in and I was shocked that so many people were put off by the word “damn”. Do we live on the same planet! Anyway I loved everything about your post (this one too!) and sent it on to several women who desperately needed to read it as well. I love your honesty. The world needs more of that and wayyyyy less legalism.
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I wanna marry you! Ask mr ortiz if he’d be willing to share you.(My attempt to express my profound kinship for your unmitigated honesty in the midst of walking in the spirit, before a
profoundly confused christian culture.
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I LOVE this blog even more now!!! About time we all got REAL honest with ourselves (but to tell you the truth I cringe at knowing how awful I’ll sound) and the world, in particular, and have the world realize that church is a place for SINNERS and for the broken – we don’t know where the perfect people are ’cause they don’t go to my church! (They have me as a member lol). Keep on keepin on girl – you rock it.
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Well said!
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If you’ve lost a reader or two, I gladly volunteer to take their place! I read your refreshing, oh-so-controversial post about the damn crockpot and then clicked “home” and found this post. Love your unapologetic honesty and raw authenticity about who you are. Refreshing. IMO, Christians should be transparent and honest about their life and struggles, sharing how Christ is growing and shaping them into His likeness from the inside out rather than focusing on our unattainable outward perfection (a white-washed Pharisee reference comes to mind). Thank you for being brave and strong and real in your posts.
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This blog is so refreshing. I truly don’t understand how someone could comment anything negative 🙂 This helps me see that I don’t have to have it all together all the time! 🙂
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good. stuff.
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Thanks for being honest! Its needed in the kingdom!
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I found you via your scandalous post. I am glad you decided not to shut the blog down. Very encouraging. Thank you!
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Like I said last week, this is freaking fracking fandamntastic! I love your honesty and transparency and the fact that you are on fiiiiiyaaahhh for the Lord. This blog IS about YOU and your praise to the Almighty One and it saddens me that my blog was used against me when all I wanted to do was update people who cared about what was going on in my life…what the??? Yeah. Haters suck. Keep on keepin on, sister, I’m tellin ya, you will be my ghost writer one of these days!!!
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Many years ago my husband was nominated? elected? to be a deacon in our church. Here’s how I found out: they announced it from the pulpit! (I knew he had been considered, but I didn’t know it had been DECIDED!) I may have slapped a smile on my face, but it was phony as a $3 bill! B/c, you see, I am NOT deacon-wife material. Every time the church secretary would call and say, “Deacon’s wife…” I wanted to s-c-r-e-a-m!!! I was so relieved when that season passed.
So, Girl, I am here to say, “I feel your pain,” and you will never hear from me that you are not living up to “my standards,” nor will I be the giver of “Godly wisdom” unless YOU ask for it…like in writing! Instead, I will pray that you continue to write your heart out before the One who holds our lives in His very hand. And, I’ll leave it up to Him to direct your path. (I will however, cringe, when I see typos, but since you can’t see me, it won’t matter. Don’t worry, I make myself cringe all the time!)
I loved your last post. I love this one too.
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Oh no, you are going to FREAK at my typos!!! Lol. Sorry in advanced!!!!
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BRAVO!
*nuff said*
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Hey Sweet Girl, Re;Prov 31 Woman. I thought your blog (article) was smart, funny and REAL. Remember Mary and Martha, we as Women can become so consumed with the “works” that we lose our focus on what really matters and that is “relationship”. And I think you hit the nail square on the head, which as a former Martha I know can be a hard pill to take, but it is truth. Christ did not say Martha was doing wrong in all her doings but that Mary had chosen better. Love is strength, love is relationship, love is a far more difficult calling to follow than being the perfect hostess, etc etc. So don’t let the Martha-s discourage you, they will get it in time. Those who have followed Holy Spirit’s leading to speak and to act have always found confrontation. It’s not you, we have an enemy. Keep on Blogging, the Devil hates it!
.
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I am SO glad my twenty or so friends shared your blog post and I finally read it because This. Blog. Is. For. Me! A mom of 3 kids under the age of 5 (2 are 2 year olds, 3 months apart..) I fail daily. But I 100% desire to be the hands of feet of Christ. To show His love to hurting a world. And remember that my ministry, in this season, are my toddlers who need to see His love too! Can’t wait to continue reading!!! Thank you for doing what you’re doing 🙂
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Reblogged this on thailyn219's Blog and commented:
Great blog.
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I appreciated your pedestal comment. I was a PK and am now a PW, You could make a fortune if you printed that on a T shirt for all pastor’s wives to wear. God bless you as you have blessed me. This blog IS for me!
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Hahaha. You are genious!!!!!
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& that right there is exactly why I knew this was the blog for me!
(& my first one I’ve ever followed!)
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Oh, Krista, I think I love you! And your Rock Star spirit. Confession…I had to ‘unsubscribe’ to comments on that said post, b/c my inbox was blowing up and still was even this AM, so I can sympathize! If so many of my ‘friends’ didn’t read my blog, I’d dish more about my woes and disdain for many a things… 😉 I enjoy your blog. It’s definitely for me!
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I LOVE THIS BLOG! Consider me a new follower! I just want to sit and chit chat with you! Love your honesty! Excited to read more.
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Omg! I love you! I have only read two of your posts, this one and the one tht caused this post! Keep on being real. There are more of us like you and we need to know we’re not alone.
Thanks for your honesty and real-ness!
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I knew I liked you girls! And, not just because you both have lived in the great PNW.
THIS is why I started blogging! I knew there had to be more women out there like me. Praise Jesus for your willingness to boast in your weakness and to make His Greatness known. Seriously, cannot wait to read more. Keep ’em coming, ladies!
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I feel you sister! From one pastor’s wife to another…Keep the honesty alive. I also hated Proverbs 31 in Bible college because of what it represented to so many men and women, and have made similar discoveries since. Keep on keeping on. You’re refreshing!
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Thanks Krista and Rach for staying true to yourselves and showing your honest hearts and faith. So inspiring! This blog is for me! xxx
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At last, someone being real and honest about life, love, faith and kids e.g. you can like music, fashion and silly TV and STILL love and live your life for God! I love your honesty and down to earth tone – keep being you! I look forward to hearing more. Big love from the UK xx
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Krista, I think I love you! Lol. I loved your crockpot post and this one made it all the better. Thank you for giving up the facades and picture-perfect posing to share from the heart. So refreshing and inspiring! 🙂
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Hi. I just want to say that I so enjoyed your refreshing honesty and yes, even cursing the crockpot! that I went on to read two more articles and logging in to receive your blog. I think as Christians we need to be real. Jesus accepted real people with real problems and then used their willingness (cursing and all) and changed the world forever. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. You have been a huge blessing to me today!
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Thank you so much for being so raw and real!! This is the first blog I have ever followed and I am oh so glad that I did!!
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love, love,love your blog…I am alot older than you but am always seeking ways to refresh my faith and deal with the stress and struggles of my life….your insight is refreshing…proud of you for taking a stance…I am staying!
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Krista,
So…let me see if I understand (truly, I AM trying to understand)…
You share this statement in summation, “You do have our word that we will be honest and raw to the core, in hopes that one day you too will be able to do the same!”.
But then, you go on to state (paraphrasing), if you don’t like what I am saying, then this is not the blog for you, If you’re going to criticize my writing or my philosophy, then this is not the blog for you, If you’re going to hold me to some standard (God forbid!) that I can’t live up to, then this is not the blog for you, etc.
So, you SEEM to be saying, Krista – I just want people who, after reading things I publish here, will say, “That’s awesome! YOU’RE awesome! You are so right! You are so wise!”.
As I said, this is what, upon reading, you seem to be saying. Am I wrong, Krista?
I too, am a “pastor’s wife” (and I, too, bristle somewhat at that label. I am also a foreign missionary, a writer, a women’s ministry leader, a worship leader – many other things that aren’t implied by that “honorific”. However, after reading several of your blog posts through, and reading them again carefully, I worry for what you may accomplish here (its probably not what you want!).
Let me be “raw and honest to the core”, for a moment 🙂
Today, the largest growing faith community in the our country is the group I think of as “Smorgasbordians”. They love Jesus, they love the idea of a Heavenly Father, they love the word…mostly. However, when the word comes up against currently accepted modern culture, they choose to leave that tidbit on the buffet rather than put it on their plate. I was recently at a conference for women in ministry – great conference, full of strong, Godly women/leaders; but for one experience. I was listening to a moderately young Methodist pastor (woman) speak who had successfully planted a church for young adults in a well known city in the northwest, a place that has traditionally rejected Christianity, and celebrates lifestyles that are counter to biblical teaching. Someone asked, “so how have you managed to be successful in a community that is so counter to Christianity as far as sexuality, relationships, social activities, etc?”. The response is what got me – the speaker said, “Listen to me! Christian pastors and leaders are just going to have to GET OVER their traditional views of morality and sexuality. Society no longer sees these things as wrong, and if you’re going to reach this generation, you’re going to have re-write your theology and beliefs to include what our society now believes is acceptable!”.
I’m sorry, but I can’t go there. I like to be culturally savvy, up with the latest trends and fashions, not seen as “that old biddy” but just as hip as my hipster teenager with his Warby Parker glasses and his Daft Punk playlists, but…I can’t go where that Pastor has gone.
That conference was 6 years ago, and I see the quiet proliferation of this Politically Correct approach to theology and God’s word beyond what I ever imagined. Like to use salty language? Why not! Confirmed ultra-hip Samuel L. Jackson sold an entire movie by shouting “I WANT THESE MOTHER-F*$@ING SNAKES OFF THIS MOTHER-F*%$ING PLANE!!” Everybody thought that was great, right? You’ll just need to ignore verses like Ephesians 4:29, 5:4, Colossians 4:6, Matthew 12:36, etc. Like to drink? Maybe even overindulge occasionally, or maybe “broaden your horizons” sexually? Why not! Chelsea Handler, trendy, popular talk show hosts and bestselling author condones it! As do any number of other celebrities, whom we all love. Just get in the practice of looking past over 100 passages warning against the use and abuse of alcohol, and several hundred speaking to sexual sin.
When I was a teenager (decades ago!), I saw a “Wittenburg Door” blog comic panel that changed my life. It was a drawing of a young adult sitting a table with a book/bible open before him, and he was bent over it with a writing instrument. His friend was standing behind him, and said, “Hi John! Underlining some of your favorite scripture passages?”, to which his friend replied, “No, just crossing out the ones that don’t apply to me”.
This, in a nutshell, is the way so many people today are approaching their “faith”. I love it and will follow His word… unless it asks me to do something that is inconvenient, unpopular, or STOP doing something I really like.
To pass off behavior with the reasoning of “I’m not perfect”, “I’m just being me”, “I just want to be REAL and HONEST to those out there who feel the same way, or are searching for spirituality”, is, in my thought, less than what God expects of us. Given what the word says, It’s intellectually dishonest, or maybe “scripturally ignorant”, to choose to ignore or misrepresent the teaching there. That young pastor/speaker at the conference I attended later said, in defense of her approach and philosophy, “I’m just trying everything I can to reach the lost. There are 300 people now attending and hearing the gospel each week in my community. No one else has been able to do that!”
However, Krista, “the end justifies the means” has never been and never will be a practice that God condones. You certainly are who you are, and are free to share your thoughts on faith, Christianity and the Christian life, but If your motivation for creating this blog is to “build each other up” in our faith and our relationships, as opposed to, say, enjoying the pats on the back and gushing accolades from those who agree with you and are appreciative for your validation of their choices – then I would counsel lots of prayer and thought before committing your thoughts to (electronic) pen and paper, and be open for those to share dissenting opinions and thoughts as well. Wisdom can be found in the “counsel of many”, especially when God is in the midst.
Godspeed
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People are such a pain! Especially the self-righteous ones! I write and it’s so hard to be real and yet, maintain your composure sometimes.
However, THIS BLOG IS FOR ME!!!!
I love this post more than the first!
Keep going and who cares about the ones who criticize?
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Hello, I am from Honduras and I absolutely LOVE your blog. I´m not a big fan of reading blogs all day but I saw this one on a friend´s facebook page and I´m SO GLAD I read it. I am really tired of reading about women who are the perfect wives, moms, christians, who wake up at 4am every day without struggling and do a billion tasks before bedtime and to top it off… they brag about it making me feel like the worst women ever.
I am so excited to know that there are real people out there who talk about their struggles freely without the fear of what people will think. I believe that being a christian doesn´t mean that you have to be a perfect woman or worse, make everyone believe that you´re perfect. Each one of us struggles every day with different aspects of our personalities, but that is what makes us grow each day.
As far as the haters… they´re entitled to their opinion, but don´t let that EVER make you stop writing. God bless you and your family!
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Love your blog! Keep doing what you’re doing – encouraging the rest of us Christian women out there trying to keep our sanity in this world of craziness!
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I applaude you! As a “pastor’s wife” of almost 25 years, and a blogger myself, I can totally relate. You had the guts to say what so many of us feel. Keep up the good- and authentic- work.
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I’ve loved reading your posts on Christian womanhood. Im a transplant in Seattle area (whoot whoot Pac NW!) and DO NOT fit the perfect little Christian woman mold. I tried and really failed. I like beer, cigars, and Jesus. No I don’t like to scrapbook, I don’t want to hold babies and I still love Jesus with ALL my heart . There’s a book called Anything by Jennie Allen. I think you two may like it. Alot. Gods used it to shake up my little snow globe over here and cling to Him as everything else around me loosens.
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Thanks for your openness, honesty, and your love for Christ. You are refreshing, and I’m not quite sure how you have so much wisdom at a young age… but God has obviously been working in your life.
Many blessings to you on your journey… all our journeys. God created His daughters to encourage each other, to share our lives, to laugh and cry, and everything in between. I have a women’s conference Fun Fearless Female -WOW the WORLD that is all about walking His grace, being Bold for the Lord, and Fearless as we go about His business… and having Fun while we do it. Blessings!
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I am new to your blog but so glad I found it! I left the church and possibly God a few years ago, in part because I didn’t fit in anywhere in His world. I have been struggling with how to be ME and still love Him. Reading through your recent post, I wonder if there’s hope IS still for that to happen. Because you seem to be a lot like me, and I see you following Him. So thanks for sharing and for not apologizing for who you are and for being who you are.
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I loved the part about the Black Eyed Peas, but now I’m curious, what song was it? and was there dancing involved? I am a Christian and I used to teach dance and their one of my fav go to bands for warm-up music. P.S. I love your honesty!
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