There’s this trait that will one day bring you to your knees about God. I know, because it happened to me this week…
There on my knees, I found myself, tears streaming from my eyes. Partly in shock, but more than anything, unashamedly grateful.
…Grateful, for a God who goes before me.
The first time I grasped how intricately God goes before me, was last summer. Life was calm and sweet, and it had been such a restful and restorative season for my family that we thought it would be the perfect time to try for another baby.
God knew differently.
Within weeks of finding out I was pregnant, we lost the pregnancy. Mere weeks after that, my husband lost his job, and with it, all stability and security for our one-income family.
I will never forget getting down on my hands and knees and stretching my arms up to the heavens as I cried. Crying, because I really really really wanted that baby. So much, I could feel what it would feel like to hold it all bundled and bunched up in my arms.
But I cried also, because I was thankful. Thankful from the bottom of my broken heart, that God did not give me what I thought I wanted — I would be in big trouble if He had! (the severance we were living off of would run out the month I would’ve been due.)
Truth is, I would have never considered having a baby in that season had I known what was around the corner, and God knew that. He protected me — My God went before me!
And like I said earlier, God did the same last week.
While my family was in the U.K. last week, my husband received word that the start-up company he was currently working for would be shutting down, literally while we were out of the country. (My husband would only return to clear off his desk. #StartUpProbs.)
And again, I cried — not because I was afraid of how we were going to pay my psychotically high rent, or because I was worried about how our single-income family would survive, let alone plant the church God called us to start. (Nor, am I pregnant for that matter. Thank you, Jesus.)
I cried because, once again, my God went before me.
Just two weeks prior to my husband’s company shutting down, he was offered another job, a better job, really… The job was there on the table if he wanted it, they said.
…And God knew we would!
God went before us — aligning another job before we had any inclination there would be a need for one! Because of that, my husband won’t go without even a SINGLE paycheck! And that has brought me to my knees in gratitude these last couple of weeks.
If you only take away one thing today, let it be this: My God goes before you as well… and He can be trusted.
In Micah 2:13 God promises, “I will be out in front leading [you].”
That means God will put events on the calendar long before you understand their meaning. It means He will masterfully orchestrate ‘coincidental connections’ that will later prove to have been Divine appointments made by a God who knows what He’s doing.
He won’t always give you what you thought you wanted, but He will protect you from what you could-have-never-known was around the corner.
And though the promise that God goes before you doesn’t mean you wont find yourself walking through a war-zone one day; in circumstances so dire, that each step threatens to take you out of the game…
It means that when you do, you will find yourself miraculously unscathed.
Unscathed, unharmed, and everything accounted for (not even a paycheck missing to pay for said: psychotically high rent) …because God, your God, was protecting you.
He’s been there all along — in front, when you were unsure which way to turn, and leading the way when you could have never known what lies ahead.
And mark my words, that protection will bring you to your knees one day.
And there on your knees you will realize – maybe even for the first time in your life – that God really, truly, can be trusted, and that your every prayer has been heard by a God who knows what He’s doing.
(The goal however, will be for us not to forget.)
// 52 weeks to write, 35 more to go //